whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
