I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
