Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
