There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
