her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize