Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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