My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
there was a trapeze. enough said
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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