Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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