On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
