Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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