i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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