I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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