I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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