its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
