someone threw a dead crab at me
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
