I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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