i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
