Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize