I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
