okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
why is half of my head shaved?
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