We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize