real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize
