she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
