Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
