I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize