It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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