Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
