I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
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