do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
