..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
