its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
