ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Randomize
