she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
