The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
