My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
