So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
