Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
