i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
