I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
