Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
