Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Text me some of your sweat
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize