Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize