is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
i out mim tonsoeep
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
