i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize