I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
