I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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