I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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