I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
