Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
