i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
